What do you say when you’re not sure how to talk to a new person at a networking event (or holiday party)?
A script that worked well for me:
- Walk toward someone.
- Extend a hand.
- Say, “Hi, I don’t think we met. What’s your name?” or “Mind if I join?”
And then you’re off to the races.
If this seems too simple, that’s the point.
It’s not the perfect tactical wordsmithing that makes or breaks you. It’s the fact that you acted and short-circuited your approach anxiety.
The parallel here to bar prep is to not spend too much time agonizing over which supplements to use, which newsletters to follow (mine of course)…
When you factor in the time spent overthinking about different options, they no longer become the fastest, best, or easiest.
Yes, do your due diligence, but the most important thing is to have a plan, start moving, and stay consistent.
If you get stuck spinning your wheels “getting your ducks in a row” deciding on the perfect plan of action, you won’t get anywhere.
In the end, whichever course or supplements you use, this is a self-study endeavor. You’re responsible for preparing yourself. Don’t forget that courses and supplements are simply there to support that.
“But it’s too cold outside, and it’s too warm inside, and this temperature delta and holiday spirit are making me too relaxed to do anything.”
“I’m committed to doing better next time!”
Next time? What have you done so far? What are you doing now?
I’m not letting you off the hook thinking “new year, new me!” and then NOT following through with your plans.
You don’t need a New Year resolution. Don’t let a date on a calendar dictate your actions.
Also, there’s an 80% chance it won’t work. How’s this year’s resolution going?
In fact, I heard you should work on resolutions in April instead of right after the holiday overwhelm.
So forget about lofty aspirations that you’ll get to someday, and do what’s going to move you forward today.
Keep the following 3 ideas in mind to light a fire under your ass and keep those buns toasty. Let’s get going.
Choose your hard
Preparing for the bar exam is hard.
Studying, retaking, and waiting yet again for results over the next 9 to 11 months is hard.
If you have to retake the February exam, next Halloween or Thanksgiving (next holiday season) is when you’d find out whether you passed.
That is a haunting length of time.
What do you want your next year to look like?
Is bar prep your priority?
I’m not saying family and holidays aren’t important.
(Is it me, or are people not really celebrating the holidays anymore these days?)
But what is your priority? The origin of the word “priorities” is singular. That is, there can only be ONE priority.
Short story: I once worked with someone debating how to fit bar prep with holiday and family duties. When I mentioned that I did MBE questions on Christmas morning, she had a revelation that she did NOT want to do that (which is fine). We decided that, you know what, the February bar exam is NOT a priority for her.
Great!
For that reason among others, July was probably a better choice. That’s perfectly fine. At least we got clarity on a more realistic approach instead of forcing something that wasn’t going to work.
Is passing the bar exam your priority—or not?
Either answer is OK! The only thing I want from us is self-honesty.
But decide so you aren’t losing momentum trying to force yourself to do something you’re not aligned with, or waiting until the last minute and saying “oh well, it’s conveniently too late now.”
On the other hand, if you’re planning to skip the upcoming exam, make sure that you’re doing it for the right reason, not to push it off just because.
BTW, it’s not going to “ruin” anything if you decide to spend a couple of hours hitting the books or take a day off. Stop being melodramatic. You could have accounted for predictable downtime by following my newsletters and study schedules and scheduling guidance.
Getting motivated for the bar exam
You already know you’re capable of doing the work.
Most people think they lack motivation when really they lack the clarity to act.
The key to clarity—and composure—is knowing the next step to take. Get clear on what you need to do, and the rest will follow.
Instead of daydreaming about a huge goal, why not just take one small step? Your brain just needs a clear entry point.
Crack open one (1) question instead of hoping the timeskip version of yourself will suddenly have the drive.
No, not later. Not when you’re “ready.” Do it today.
You don’t need a beautiful cause either. It’s OK if you don’t have anything like that.
You just have to find the formula that works for you and gets you up every day energized to do something that matters to you. These are all valid motives to short-circuit your hesitation to act:
- Superficials like money, status, and vanity (despite what they told you at law school orientation)
- Not wanting to write yet another essay or answer yet another multiple-guess question
- Never again wanting to be distracted away from holidays and time with your family and friends
- It’s the only thing standing in your way of your legal career
- Even vague platitudes like “I just want to help people”
Look at these real examples of what other readers have said motivated them. I love the personal honesty. Bar prep is personal.
You don’t need the sugarcoated reasons you wrote in your personal statement. You don’t need to get everything perfect.
You just have to pass the bar one time.
Still not motivated enough? Here are more ways to bring back your motivation.
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